


Just a world away

by aswerene



Series: Just a world away AU [1]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Angst, Gen, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-11
Updated: 2018-02-11
Packaged: 2019-03-16 23:10:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13646379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aswerene/pseuds/aswerene
Summary: I still remember the night he came to our door, frozen from the cold rain. He was as wild and unpredictable as he was timid and scared. It took weeks to gain his trust. And his love. Today, 10 months later, he is my son and I can’t bear to lose him. Not like this.





	Just a world away

   

***

 _I know it's hard to tell how mixed up you feel_  
_Hoping what you need is behind every door_  
_Each time you get hurt, I don't want you to change_  
_Because everyone has hopes, you're human after all_  
_The feeling sometimes, wishing you were someone else_  
_Feeling as though you never belong_  
_This feeling is not sadness, this feeling is not joy_  
_I truly understand. Please, don't cry now_

***

I find him outside in the garden. He’s standing in the rain, no jacket, while the drops falls down on us. The horizon is red, the sun is starting to rise across the city. Stripes, like flames, are reflected in the bay and across the glass windows of the business towers in the heart of the city. Every morning the city burns the darkness away, chases all criminals back into hiding.

This is my home, my chosen purpose. But the city refuses me each day anew. I take pride in the night and I belong to it like the criminals I chase. The sunrise, this golden light, I can only appreciate from my home. And here he is, watching a last sunrise across this city, which used to be an unknown place to him. It’s not home, could never fully be, but I had hoped he’d be content enough to stay.

I try to walk closer without alerting him. The rain is not strong enough to cover my movement and the sounds of my steps on the ground. He’s so close, yet so far. I could approach him silently, but I'm here just as myself, open, honest.

“Is there anything… I could do to change your mind?”

He turns and stares at me, his blue eyes clouded. After a moment of silence, he sighs and shakes his head. “You know that I have to do this.”

I know, I do. But I can’t accept it.

I still remember the night he came to our door, frozen from the cold rain. He was as wild and unpredictable as he was timid and scared. It took weeks to gain his trust. And his love. Today, 10 months later, he is my son and I can’t bear to lose him. Not like this.

“Bruce,” he turns his back to me, his shoulders shake, “tell David I’m sorry.”

“You could tell him yourself. He’d want to… say goodbye, at least.” I take a step towards him. The gun in his hand sways back and forth, ever so slightly. He stole it from the vault, easily cracked the security code of the safe. I underestimated him and now I’ll have to pay for it. I wish he would stay, just a bit longer, just another day, another week. I’ll solve this riddle, I will, if only I had more time. Please. I just need more time. “He will miss you.” I will miss you.

I take another step closer. The mud beneath my feet mutes the sound, but he can hear me. He trembles, but doesn’t move away. If things were different, he would stay, I’m sure of it. But I can’t blame him for his decision. He wants to go home, he needs to go home. Whatever followed him here, it won’t leave him be. It followed us all the way across the Atlantic. And when we tried to confront it, David barely survived. _"It will follow me… when I leave."_ he had whispered, clinging to David’s bloody arm. _"I have to leave."_

***

 _Please don't go, I want you to stay_  
_I'm begging you please, please don't leave here_  
_I don't want you to hate;_  
_For all the hurt that you feel,_  
_The world is just illusion, trying to change you_

***

“It’s not your fault.” He needs to hear this, more than anything else. He came here unwillingly, he never chose to stay. We made him promise us and he complied, because he grow fond of us the same we started to love him like one of us. If I ever find him in this world, I will do right by him. This is my vow, today, here, the city as my witness.

“Doesn’t matter now.” He laughs, a choked, ugly sound. “I’ll be gone before it gets a chance to get to the kids.”

“Jason-”

“It’s okay, Bruce. No hard feelings. I had a great time.” Again, that choked laughter.

Just another step, just one more. I’m close enough to touch. He can tell, he braces himself, ready to fight me off if he needs to. I’m not here to fight, I couldn’t. He’s made his decision. And like this, here, is better than any alternative. I can’t lock him up just to keep him here. I wrap my arm around his shoulders, pull him against my chest. He’s tense, braces himself against my hold. A few seconds we struggle, he’s strong enough to hold out against me. But then his head falls back against my shoulder.

***

 _A part of your soul ties you to the next world_  
_Or maybe to the last, but I'm still not sure_  
_But what I do know, is to us the world is different_  
_As we are to the world but I guess you would know that_

***

“Jerk.” He grins, face half hidden by shadows. “You’re playing unfair.”

“Guilty as charged…” I can’t help but smile as well. I loathe the tough-guy-act he puts on most of the time. He’s as broken as all of us, but he never had the chance to accept it as a part of him. For him it’s his weakness. For me, for David, it only makes him stronger.  
Together, we watch the sun rise higher on the horizon. The city glimmers in red and gold, as beautiful as she can be. Sometimes we forget how wonderful she is. Every night we go out, fight crime and hatred, only to miss the new morning, the new hope rising in the city. Gotham is only dark at night. It’s vital to remember that there still are good people out there, ready to face a new day, trying to make a difference. It's why we do this.

I can feel his arm tense, can hear the safety on the gun click. “You shouldn’t stay out here. If… if it doesn’t work anymore, because I’ve stayed here too long, I don’t want you to, you know, in case…” He pulls free from my hold, just enough so we don’t touch anymore. My hand lingers close to his shoulder.

“I’ll stay.” I mutter. I can feel the tears gathering in my eyes. My chest tightens. “I’ll stay, no matter what.”

Rain drops roll from his hair. We’re both soaked. But he doesn’t tremble from the cold. Neither do I.  
I can only stare at his back, as his frame shakes, as he hangs his head to gather his courage. How I wish I could tell his Bruce what horrible mistakes he has made. What a wonderful son he has and how delicate he is. He needs more than he has ever received from his father and I could barely give him back all that he deserves. The time was way too short. It wasn’t enough.

Slowly he turns towards me. His face is pale, his blue eyes cast down. “Bruce-”

***

 _Please don't go, I want you to stay_  
_I'm begging you please, please don't leave here_  
_I don't want you to hate for all the hurt that you feel_  
_The world is just illusion trying to change you_  
_Please don't go, I want you to stay_  
_I'm begging you please, oh please don't leave here_  
_I don't want you to change;_  
_For all the hurt that you feel,_  
_This world is just illusion, always trying to change you_

***

No, not yet. Not before I tell him what he needs to hear, what he should have been told years ago. “Jason, first… I’m glad you stranded here and stayed with us, became family.”

“Bruce-”

“First- thank you for being my son.”

“Bruce, please, don-”

“First- I’m proud of you.”

“Bruce, please, I can’t-” tears run down his cheeks, mix with the water still falling down on us.

I feel my own tears fall, but I have to be strong. This is our goodbye. As gently as I can, I gather him in my arms, press him against my chest. His sobs shake his body, his cries are muffled against the fabric of my shirt. I let myself cry with him, silently, stoic, holding him as close as I can without crushing him. “Remember me…” he whispers against my shirt, “just this… it’s enough…”

“I’ll never forget you, son.” I press a kiss against his soaked hair. I can feel it. As he raises his arm, aims. The trigger clicks. “I love you.” I close my eyes.

A gunshot rings.

Silence.

The metal falls to the ground. And Jason’s body is gone. I blink the tears away. Around me is no trace of him, just the gun lying in the grass. Even his footsteps on the muddy ground have disappeared. As if he had never been here.

Gone. He’s gone.

***

 _Please don't go, I want you to stay_  
_I'm begging you please, please don't leave here_  
_I don't want you to hate for all the hurt that you feel_  
_The world is just illusion trying to change you_

 _Please don't go, I want you to stay_  
_I'm begging you please, oh please don't leave here_  
_I don't want you to change;_  
_For all the hurt that you feel,_  
_This world is just illusion, always trying to change you_

***

It takes me a moment to register the arms around my shoulders. They are bandaged, blood red and white. “It’s okay…” David whispers, his voice hoarse from crying. “Let me be the big brother for once.”

I cling to him. My knees give out.

Together, we sink down into the grass.

Together, we weep.

**Author's Note:**

> picture credit: www.pexels.com
> 
> Song: VNV Nation - Illusion
> 
> ***
> 
> "First - Second" is a game played by this Bruce and his family. Since it is sometimes hard to talk about feelings, if something hurts or bothers you, the kids can tell two things. One of them is true, one of them is a lie. If they want the others to know what's wrong, they can tell an easy lie. If not, they can make it hard. But either way, they have spoken aloud what's wrong, giving Bruce (and David) the chance to figure out what's wrong. They both use the same "game" as well.  
> So, who is David? And this AU Bruce has a twin brother, David. They share being Batman, to give each other time to rest a few days each week. This way the mental strain is not as big on either of them and they are emotionally more stable.   
> They have a family, kids they've adopted and who fight crime with them. But none of the ones in DC canon.
> 
> If you want to know what happened to Jason, read the next sentences, if not, don't.   
> Jason travels through different worlds, followed by a dark creature that hunts him. This wasn't the first world he has landed on. When he dies, he moves to the next world, hopefully his home. But the longer he stays, the more unstable the magic that transport him to new worlds becomes. At some point, he has to leave.


End file.
